Left's recruitment drive!

Buoyed by the recent success in Rajasathan elections, where the left managed to triple their electoral fortunes (from 1 to 3 seats), the left decided to go in for a recruitment drive. The think-tank of the left ,primarily led by their voracious general (secretary) ,decided that it was time to expand their base. In their pot-puri* meeting they decided that they should take communism to the 'Masses'.

So, taking this message seriously , the 'General' decided to venture out to the forest. He did this since the latest census  still gave the non-humans a lead (in pure number terms)  over the human population. He also was of the view that communism may be at least viewed well by the non-humans. Our relatively young and dynamic general managed to find a group which he believed needed communism the most.        

It was the “worker bees”.He manged to attract a vast gathering of them by his very presence. . Below is the excerpt from this speech made to this large gathering,

" Dear Comrades,

                               I would first of all like to thank you for giving me a opportunity to speak. . It is a great pleasure to address such a huge gathering. I have never seen such a big crowd in my life and that too perched on a tree's bark. I have never seen such unbridled  communist enthusiasm anywhere. My friends, by birth you are designated as 'workers'.  It is a gargantuan capitalistic  conspiracy friends !;which has made you into a worker. You are asked to work for your capitalistic, profit minded 'Queen Bee'. I understand your pain; fellow comrades. You have to work without minimum wages and also under harsh labor conditions. There is only one solution for all this , my friends .Join our party!. We are currently the fastest growing party in Rajasthan; we have one of the oldest chief ministers in the country ( a lil senile maybe) and we had the unique distinction of being in opposition and also being in power!.Yes!, friends, we are certainly a unique party .We are still the only party which actually has an ideology different from others. We manged to bring the country to brink of elections for a nuclear deal. We are not ideologically bankrupt, we are still relevant as shown by our recent opposition to the nuclear deal. We don't believe that capitalism works although it does in the states we rule. We may be inconsistent in state politics ,but we still oppose all reform bills in the center in the name of ideology.

(After hearing a couple of yawns..he comes back to the point).

 If you join our party we promise the we will bring wage control to all worker bees , that is all of you shall work at least for minimum wages. You guys can decide my friends how much you want to be paid. Yes..friends, you can decide everything - no of leaves that you want to take in a year, your pension benefits, name it and we will have it included. Now, friends if you have any question ask me.”

From the back of the crowd,A bespectacled geek bee asked "'Worker bee - Queen bee' is set to be the perfect example of communist system where in which  everyone works for the prosperity of the state. I don't understand how you can label this as a "capitalistic system" ?

Gen:  Your are just as confused as our West Bengal CM's...Next question..

Another weired looking bee asked, "Communist manifesto does not make any mention of bees. How do you claim this system will work for Bees ? "

Gen: Updated version will be out shortly which will include all living beings. Thanks for pointing out the typo in the great book.

A few extreme right wingers standing in the front section of the crowd decided it was time to pull the curtains on the show. They decided to teach our general a lesson. They let out a cry "Jai bee mata ! " and  set about attacking our general .That unfortunately was the last we heard of our general.

*To be read as Politburo

Updates: Updated version of this post can be seen at http://mindry.in/blog/2008/12/15/birds-bees-and-communism/